The time in the wheel of the year between Mabon and Yule is heavy with themes of sacrifice, loss, and death. Today, I want to share a spell with you that will help you tap into that energy. If you find that you’re in a state of grief and processing the death of a loved one, I hope this ritual can also provide some relief. Let’s learn how to cast a Mourning Mother Apple Spell for Mourning a Loved One.
Trigger Warning: We’re going to talk about death, mourning, and child loss today. If this subject would be triggering, this might not be the post for you.
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The dark half of the year officially begins after the Autumn Equinox with Mabon when nights officially have more minutes than days. It will then last all the way until the Spring Equinox with Ostara when the number of daylight minutes become longer again.
During this time of year, many witches and pagans connect to these seasonal changes by observing themes such as darkness, death, mourning, loss, sacrifice, and survival. The spell for mourning I’m going to share with you can help you tap into these themes energetically.
Mabon, often also called the Witch’s Thanksgiving, has many of the same themes as other harvest festivals of thanksgiving. However, this time comes with a dark side. After the official start of the Autumn Equinox, which marks Mabon season, nights officially become longer than days. The season of autumn begins, and a thriving environment around us begins to die and succumb to cold, short days.
A Bit of Dark Season Mythology
Some pagan traditions also observe this time as the dying of the sun or sun gods. The sacrifice comes willingly, but that doesn’t make sacrifice any easier.
Many pantheons and mythologies also explain the turning of the seasons from summer into fall with stories of mothers mourning the loss of a child.
During this time, the goddess mourns the coming death of the god. Persephone returns to the Underworld, and Demeter’s pain brings about a cold, harsh winter. Even Mabon himself was a kidnapped infant whose mother mourned his disappearance.
Samhain brings the spirits of our beloved dead back to us for a short time as the veil begins to thin, and we are provided an opportunity to process death and celebrate those lives.
For these reasons, the dark half of the year, and specifically Mabon/Samhain are times to honor those who have been lost or sacrificed their lives in service to others. It’s a time to give energy to the dark goddesses and crones. Because of so many lost children stories surrounding Mabon, this is also a time to pay respect to all mothers who mourn lost children.
This ritual is designed to tap into the energy of Mabon and Samhain, to help us honor our beloved dead, and to offer strength and support to those in mourning.
The Mourning Mother Apple Spell
There are several different ways to approach this spell for mourning, and how you choose to do so will depend on whether you are the person in mourning or if you just want to tap into the energy of death and loss and provide spiritual support to anyone else in mourning.
I’ve also included the basic spell that you can work along with some additional correspondences that are not necessary. They can, however, help you boost your magic and increase the odds of success if you’re still new to the practice.
What You'll Need:
Best time to cast:
- Mabon or Samhain
- a waning moon if processing grief
- a waxing moon if offering strength to others
Circle casting is optional.
Basic materials:
- an apple – strongly associated with autumn, representative of witchcraft when cut horizontally to reveal a hidden pentagram, also often used in love spells and as offerings to the dead, making them useful for working with lost loved ones.
- a knife – for cutting the apple
- a black candle – loss and mourning.
- an orange candle – strength.
- oil – for dressing candles
- chrysanthemum or marigold petals – traditionally used to guide the spirits of the dead home, associated with strength.
- basil or hawthorn – associated with supporting a grieving heart.
Bonus materials:
- photos or items that connect you to your loved one – use to adorn your workspace.
- hematite – grounding, protective, calming.
- obsidian – grounding, protective, helps with processing trauma.
- onyx – calming, healing, protective, helps with processing trauma.
- rhyolite – supports in healing trauma and positive transformation.
- smoky quartz – protection, supports transformation, helps you stay open to messages from the universe.
How to Cast:
How you approach this spell for mourning depends on your intention. Before casting, consider your purpose. Are you practicing symbolically for the dying sun god, literally for your lost loved one, or sympathetically to honor mourning mothers at Mabon? Adjust as needed, and make your magic your own!
Step 1: First, gather your materials. If using the bonus items, arrange them in your work space. If you prefer to cast a circle and call in the quarters, deities, or spiritual guides, do this now.
Step2: Next, prep your candles. Dress the black candle with the petals. This will represent loss and mourning. It will also either draw your lost loved ones home or help you connect to and release feelings of loss. Dress the orange candle with the basil or hawthorn to represent strength and help support healing feelings of trauma and grief. It will either support you in processing your own grief or put the energy of strength and healing into the universe.
Step 3: Light the black candle and focus on loss and mourning as it serves your personal intention. You could meditate on the themes of the season, honor those who have suffered loss, or work through your own feelings and emotions.
Step 4: Then, light the orange candle and focus on strength as it serves your personal intention. Imagine the light from the candle strengthening you or releasing the energy of strength into the universe.
Step 5: When you feel ready, cut the apple in half horizontally to reveal the seeds in a pentacle shape. Pop out the seeds and hold them in your hand. Focus on feeling the energy of potential for life that they hold and the potential for death, as large amounts of the seeds are toxic.
Step 6: Replace seeds on the bottom half of the apple. Charge this half with the feeling of loss, and secure the seeds in place with black candle wax.
Step 7: Replace seeds on the top half of the apple. Charge this half with feelings of life and strength, and secure the seeds in place with orange candle wax.
Step 8: Add more wet wax if needed, then press the two halves back together, sealing the apple. Use a couple of toothpicks to hold the pieces in place.
Step 9: Hold the apple in your hand again. Focus on the mingling energy of both grief and strength, light and dark, death and rebirth. Allow yourself to feel any emotions that may come up. If you wish, say a quick prayer or words of support to your own guides for support. Alternately, say a prayer to support the mothers of missing children, both magical and mundane, that they find strength during this time of year.
Step 10: Finally, leave the apple at your altar space as an offering. Bury it in the ground when you feel it is time to do so.
A Reflection on This Spell for Mourning a Loved One
Facing darkness is never easy. This ritual is very much an example of shadow work, forcing you to hold a mirror to yourself and reflect on your own darkness and pain. Remember, when we work to find this balance, we can’t ignore the full spectrum of life experience. Good exists in the world that deserves to be honored. Pain also exists in the world. It, too, deserves to be honored.
Just like you should allow yourself to feel gratitude and love, allow yourself, as much as you can, to feel loss and pain, too. We can’t truly appreciate all the beauty that life has to offer without also facing what makes it excruciatingly painful.
If you have performed this Mourning Mother Apple Spell for Mourning a Loved One, reflect on your experience in the comments below. Let us know what you were able to embrace and release.
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